Wednesday, November 7, 2012


My days speed by so quickly that I have very little time to process what they really mean. I think and plan about how I will be able to get things done most efficiently and correctly. I battle stress way too often. I over-commit myself; I have to work and I have to keep working on my education, I intern to become qualified for future jobs. Then I make myself take time to invest in the lives of those around me, because that is what I really want to do.

Yesterday I spent the morning actually reflecting on the beauty that I see around me every day. I was thinking about possessions and how even the car I own is simply a tool that helps me to get to the places I need to be every day. I held a little girl from Iraq and saw the beauty in her big brown eyes. I watched the birds in the sky. I was driving and thinking about optimism; how joy is a choice, and I just haven't been remembering to choose it lately. I was thinking about joy.

It was raining.

Then as I slowed down to exit the highway, my car started hydroplaning on the wet road and slowly slid into the metal barrier on the side. The front side of my car was crushed. My thoughts switched from joy to irony. Then defeat.

I guess sometimes things happen in our lives that we can't control. But we still have a choice to make about ourselves. Whether or not the front of my car is smashed doesn't change who I am, unless I allow it to. Because at the end of the day, that Iraqi girl has the same beautiful eyes, the birds are still in the sky, and the car that I use as a tool still works. The choice that I was thinking about is still there. It's always there, now matter how much extreme irony fills my day. And I can let the cosmetic condition of a car define my perspectives today, or I can choose to transcend the discouragement I feel about that. I hope I can do the latter...

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